Anyone with any good horse racing quotes or jokes?

I remembered these two last night from my Grandpa from when I was younger....

"You can beat a race, but you can't beat the races."


"I found a new way to beat the horses. You get a stick, and you beat them!"

My DAD used to say...IF HORSES RAN TO FORM WE WOULD ALL BE RICH...w2w

"Horse sense is something horses have that keeps them from betting on people" - W.C. Fields

A trainer from a POOR ,and I mean POOR, East Kentucky town was taking his pride to run in the Ky, Derby. They had no means of communication but Telegraph. The mayor of the town made the Trainer promise to send a message after the big race. Sure enough after the Derby here come the telegraph, S.S. F.F. No one could figure out the message, except one person who stumbled in the office. He said the only thing it could mean was Strarted Second Finished First and all agreed. They have a Giant celebration planned, band to greet the trainer and all.Well here comes the train and the celebration starts. The trainer leads his horse off the train and with a sadden look on his face asked the Mayor if he had gotten his message? Sure the mayor said, Started Second Finished First. No No No said the trainer Started Stumbled Farted and Fell!